There is always Joy

There is always joy.

And it may not be evident in the way I speak now,

But this is exactly my point.

So please hear me out.

Joy is not always obvious.

It is often overlooked.

Joy is not always tangible.

But it is there inside you.

Joy is even there in our struggles.

It may sound cliché,

But believe me it's true.

I want you to close your eyes.

I want you to close your eyes

because I want to share with you,

The same feeling I felt,

as I bring you to that one moment of my life one late evening.

It was already late and silent

as everyone is dozed off by the weight of the day.

The clock on my phone ticks to 12:17

as I left my room to get some air.

And I march the empty corridor as if traversing an unchartered territory.

Under the soft and flickering light,

I slowly stride my limping feet sniffing the varying smell as I pass through room by room.

Let alone the monotonous rhythm made by the buzzing sound of the oscillating e-fans.

As I push the glass door out,

a quiet and peaceful night welcomed me.

Quite the opposite of the feeling I bear ATM.

Inside was a constant tug-of-war, restless,

an ambivalence of searching and self-induced consoling.

But then I was cheered up by the maniac moon

peeping around the corner as I gaze upward.

I wonder how a thing could still give off some light

while others seemed enjoying the darkness as they close their eyes.

Selfless, unassuming that’s how I describe the moon that ‘mor-night’.

Then I was drawn back to my senses,

pulled back to my reality that I am suffering.

Silently shouting at the top of my lungs,

Goodness gracious, somebody help me!

As I forwarded my steps toward the lamp post

in front of the lone basketball ring,

One reality occurred to me,

that sometimes you have to suffer alone to give peace to others.

That you have to suffer for a while to give way for their happiness.

And most especially, you have to suffer for a while to give way to God’s plan for you.

Joy is even there in our struggles.

It may sound cliché,

But believe me its true.

So where can we find the joy in suffering?

You may not find it in you, but in the one who created you.

God is ever joyful when we remain faithful to his plan for us.

When we remain true to his Words.

So there is always joy, even in our pain.

If that pain is the price we have to pay in pursuing God’s plan for us.

This realization became the pill I ever needed that night.

To calm the storms inside.

To hush me to sleep like a baby at his mother’s bosom.

Cheers to the pain that we have to endure for the sake of our vocation!

And cheers to the joy at the end of these pains!